Hey y’all. I hear ladies express frustration over this all the time. They were getting to know this guy, they had been on a few dates, talked on the phone and texted regularly, and then alllll of a sudden, Rico Suave disappears without a trace like his cousin, Carmen San Diego!
Alas, I must confess: I was ghosted once. This guy was incredibly charming and super fun to be around. I thought that things were going somewhere! He met my family. Things seemed to be going well. Then, one day he just stopped calling and texting. I reached out to him…and the other end of the phone line was basically like, “Nobody live here”. I was hurt, but not devastated…all glory to God because I felt like I should be devastated. The Lord really protected my heart in this case. The part that hurt the most was that we had become really good friends and before the relationship went on to the “next level,” dude was gone.
So how did I recover?
1) Well, I processed it with several friends who had been following the journey. I told them how I felt. They were the classic friends who said things like, “Girl, you deserve better! We liked him! This is terrible! You want me to do something???”
2) I talked to my family. I mean, he had met them for crying out loud. They liked him too so they were a little taken aback but forever on my side lol.
3) I read articles about how to deal with it (I mean c’mon, I’m a millennial who loves to put all of this stuff in my search engine of choice…I take the scholarly approach). Here’s a good one to check out.
4) I talked to God…a lot. I told the Lord how I honestly felt and asked for His comfort.
5) I decided to agree with God and let him go.
Then what happened?
Chile, the man came back months later! As one of my friends put it: “Girl, he found out that ain’t no other Clarissa out there!” #touchĂ©
It took a while to rebuild trust within our relationship, but I can say that it was worth going through the rebuilding process.
No, this doesn’t happen to everyone. In my case, I’m glad because the guy is one of my best friends to this day. Who but God knows if anything will come of this, but I’m glad that I didn’t write him off like he wrote me off (ooooo that’ll preach!).
If you’re ghosted, please don’t stay in a pity party too long because it won’t be helpful. Do acknowledge your feelings and take some of the tips above. God is definitely faithful to bring us through even this!